The Sergeant Shultz Theory Of Law Enforcement

Here's how the authorities in Oregon describe the crime:

As 15-year-old Dani Countryman struggled beneath Gilberto Arellano Gamboa, pinned to the floor with her pants down, he called on his cousin to help subdue the girl. Alejandro Rivera Gamboa responded by stepping on Countryman's throat until she stopped moving...Gilberto Javier "Gabe" Arellano Gamboa, 23, who is also known as Rivera Gamboa, and Alejandro Emeterio "Alex" Rivera Gamboa, 24, were arraigned Tuesday in Clackamas County Circuit Court on charges of aggravated murder.

Here's how the authorities responded when asked how they could have arrested one of these illegal immigrants four times in the past seven years for DUI, and yet he was able to remain in this country, to rape and murder a teenager:

"I've never asked somebody if they're legal or illegal," said Lt. Jason Gates, spokesman for the Multnomah County Sheriff's Office. "It's none of my business."

Thanks, Lieutenant. I'm sure Dani's family is glad to hear that. Wouldn't want a criminal to feel uncomfortable, now would we?

The families of the three students lined up and executed by an illegal immigrant in New Jersey probably feel the same way. The same with the mother of the 13-year-old girl whose naked pictures showed up at the photo lab of a Virginia Wal-Mart, taken by an illegal immigrant now under arrest for child pornography.

And that's just the past week.

If you're saying to yourself "Thank God these crimes didn't happen here in Massachusetts," you may want to keep in mind that, thanks to Gov. Patrick and Mayor Menino, we have the same "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy on illegal immigrants here.

UPDATE: And the Worcester is considering whether or not to post a "Criminals Welcome!" sign at the city limits.