Attention Arborists! Leominster Needs You!
What kind of tree is this, anyway? Is it a "holiday" tree, a "giving" tree or a "winter" tree? Maybe it's one of those infamous "secular trees" put up by terrified municipal officials in Kensington, MD a few years ago around (but not on!) December 25th.
Who knows? One thing is certain, however: It's not a "you-know-what" tree! No! Absolutely not! Don't believe me? Just ask "you-know-who" when he comes down your chimney you-know-when.